We Can Be Heroes*

You know you've been on your laptop for too long when you avoid eye contact with your reflection in the screen. The important thing about this occurrence is that I decided to do something about it.
This goes right along with my theories that Apple and Facebook are in tandem trying to hack into our minds to install mini-robots they've invented together years ago. Of this I am deeply concerned.

But honestly, I spend so much time on my computer that I'm probably exceeding the yearly "healthy dosage" for radiation poisoning. Going along with that, I feel like getting no radiation would be the "healthiest". But that, again, reminds me that I could not - even if it was my one true dream - be a chemist. I have way too much creativity to handle that sort of occupation and am now frightened of microwaves (they give off "micro waves", which is, frighteningly, a type of radiation).
So, here is me doing my part.

Dear various technological devices,

I can't believe what you've done to me. You've completed me in all the ways I didn't know needed completing. At this point, I physically cannot go half a day without checking Facebook and I never take my headphones out. I never knew how much social networking I was capable of or the crap I could buy online with my parent's money. What with all the googling I take part in, my typing skills have done nothing but improved, not to mention the pointless information I've gathered that directly applies to my life.
Don't even get me started on the benefits owning a laptop has provided. Now, I can go into my room, completely secluded from the rest of the house and family to surf the inter-webs without interruption. The same can be said for owning an iPhone. When all of the cool kids whip out their smart devices in the hallway before class, I can participate in this "modern twiddling of thumbs" and further ignore my superiors. I couldn't be happier.
The internet in general has also provided for me tenfold. Not only is research at the push of a button, I no longer have to read books, own a dictionary, or participate in social interactions off screen.

I find it kind of funny, I find it kind of sad,**
Maddie.

*Musical Reference #1: David Bowie - Heroes (but you should know that)
**Musical Reference #2: Tears for Fears (but I prefer Gary Jules' version) - Mad World (you should know that too)